I am so devistated

I need advice. Keep me anonymous please. I'm fucked up right now.

I have this male friend and we've been cool for years. I knew he liked me, but he couldn't say it and I also ignored him because he really had nothing to offer me. He was broke and he had nothing going on for him. I liked him too though. He was caring and possessed all the qualities I want in a guy but because he was broke, I put those emotions to bed.

Along the line, he dated and after a short period the girl he was with broke up with him because she noticed her boyfriend was in love with me. I was also dating someone else. I was also in love with this male friend of mine but couldn't show it. I was being a hard girl and I focused on my then boyfriend. My boyfriend also broke up with me because he claims I was on love with my male friend and it was obvious.

My male friend proposed to me, and I accepted his proposal within a heartbeat. I loved him and I didn't care about him being broke but after two months, nothing was really working out for him. I was at the University (Level 300) and he wasn't schooling. He was always talking about how he has plans and how he'll break through one day. That day seems to never come. A guy on campus proposed to me and I accepted his proposal. He found out and got devastated but I made him understand that I loved him, but I wanted someone who was serious with their lives and not someone who was always talking about breakthroughs and dreams which might never happen. He kept begging and I gave him an option to consider being a side chick which he accepted.

For someone who had nothing to offer, he was trying to play the main boyfriend role, so I had to end it with him and focus on the guy on campus.

I had feelings for him though and it wasn't easy cutting off the love of your life out of your life just like that. The guy I was with eventually kept cheating on me and I broke up with him and moved on.

I graduated and finished my national service and I hadn't heard from the other guy (my male friend) after the break up and it had been more than 2 years.

During the time I was still in school through to the time I was doing my service that was when I realized how much I really loved him and how childish I was then, and I wanted him and nobody else. My search for him became serious then and that was when I realized that it would be more difficult to access him because I couldn't go to his house cause during the period when I was trying to break up with him his mom called on me to come and see her, but I didn't go which was seen as disrespectful on my behalf.

His numbers weren't going through and since I broke up with him in the manner I did, I found it difficult to approach any of his sisters or friends to ask for his number or his whereabouts.

I missed him and I was dying inside. At this point I didn't care if he was living in the gutters or not, I was willing to risk it all for him. I loved him and I was going crazy.

Seems God had finally answered my plea to find him.

A guy on my contact list who happens to be my customer of mine (I ran an online pre-order business) posted a guy on his status last week. This person looked like the guy I had been looking for but this time  he seemed different. I reached out to my customer and asked about the person's name, and it was him. I begged him to give me his number. He was hesitant so I offered him a 70% discount on any purchase he makes from me. I was that desperate. I even cried when he confirmed it was him.

He gave me his contact and it was a foreign number. I didn't even think it through, and nothing came to mind. I was just happy with tears flowing down my cheeks cause I had finally found him.

I sent him a text at 9pm that evening and he replied at 5am and I was there in his dm waiting like a mad person or a stalker.

I told him it was me and he asked how I was doing and I told him about how much I missed him and he said he missed me too. We exchanged pleasantries and caught up a bit and I asked him if we could meet up and talk because I have a lot to tell him. His reply was I'm all the way in Melbourne and you're in Accra. How is that going to be possible dear?  I didn't know the place he was talking about, so I offered to go over to his end if he didn't mind and he replied Wait a minute .... You have no idea where Melbourne is do you? and I said No.

He asked me to check his number and ran the first three digits to find out where he was. That was how I found out he was in Australia. I got back to him, and I was like Oh! You're in Australia and he was like, yeah. For now. I only came here with my girlfriend to tour. We'll be back home in Germany on Thursday. My world just crumbled. I couldn't ask about his girlfriend, and I couldn't inquire and go into details because I was just holding my phone and I was just sobbing. I would've have killed myself if not for my sister's intervention that day. I was torn apart.

I have been viewing his stats a lot and I have been texting him like crazy. I sometimes get late replies and it's killing me.

From what he told me he and his girlfriend travel a lot. The lady is a so-called lover of the world and wants to experience different cultures and all that.  He wants me to tell him what I wanted to tell him in person, and I don't know how to even start and where to end.

I love him and anytime he posts himself with the lady, I just go offline and cry.

I won't lie, the lady is very beautiful. She seems to be a mixed race. The guy has also changed a lot.

The last time we spoke, and I asked him about his relationship, he said he's looking forward to marrying the lady before the year ends.

He's even about to be a father. The lady is a few weeks pregnant. I found that out on his WhatsApp status.

I'm devastated and I don't know what to do.